Friday, June 15, 2012

6.15.12



I never knew how tears tasted until I met you,.
I thought I know how pain feels, until I met you.
I never knew regrets, until I met you.
I thought I know what "misses someone" feels like until I met you.
I thought I knew love all along, not until I met you.
but there's one thing I still don't know.


Its when to give up, or still hold on.


Or maybe, I do know.





Shadows settle on the place, that you left.
Our minds are troubled by the emptiness.
Destroy the middle, it's a waste of time.
From the perfect start to the finish line.

And if you're still breathing, you're the lucky ones.
'Cause most of us are heaving through corrupted lungs.
Setting fire to our insides for fun
Collecting names of the lovers that went wrong
The lovers that went wrong.

We are the reckless, 
We are the wild youth
Chasing visions of our futures
One day we'll reveal the truth
That one will die before he gets there.
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/d/daughter/youth.html ]
And if you're still bleeding, you're the lucky ones.
'Cause most of our feelings, they are dead and they are gone.
We're setting fire to our insides for fun.
Collecting pictures from the flood that wrecked our home, 
It was a flood that wrecked this... 

... and you caused it... 
... and you caused it... 
... and you caused it... 

Well I've lost it all, I'm just a silouhette, 
A lifeless face that you'll soon forget, 
My eyes ae damp from the words you left, 
Ringing in my head, when you broke my chest.
Ringing in my head, when you broke my chest.

And if you're in love, then you are the lucky one, 
'Cause most of us are bitter over someone.
Setting fire to our insides for fun, 
To distract our hearts from ever missing them.
But I'm forever missing him.

And you caused it, 
And you caused it, 
And you caused it



Friday, June 8, 2012

F*** Y**

OH FUCK BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY THIS.

YOU HAVE PUSHED ME TO MY LIMIT.

No more, no more disrespect. No more pain. No more anger. No more of your lame excuses. No more of you. No more of any of this.
This is the first time that I have cried in anger.
I just hope you had the balls to admit if you don't want to stick around anymore.
You're a pussy! A coward! A selfish little PRICK!!!!!!!

Mark my words

I WILL NEVER, EVER FORGET THIS DAY UNLIT I DIE.

Sunday, June 3, 2012

birthday tribute to a good friend.


Hindi ko akalain na magging close ako sa isang taong nakilala ko sa malayo lamang. Akala ko dati, hndi mo makikilala ang isang tao kapag hndi pa kayo nagkita personally. Mali pala. Ngayon ko napatunayan na wala sa distansya ang pagkakaibigan.

Labee you are more than just a kuya (naks kuya daw) to us, you're a friend as well (minsan bespren pa), buddy, someone who you can run to when everything's not going well, listener, adviser, and of course, part of our family na. Isa sa pinaka magandang desisyon na ginawa ni ilay ay hayaan kang maging parte ng buhay nya, at namin, at sayo naman, parte din ng buhay at pamilya mo. Labee I could not thank you enough for all the things you've done for us, for me especially. Napaka BUTI mong tao, napaka understanding na minsan kahit sarili ko hndi ko maintindihan pero ikaw naiintindihan mo pa rin ako (bakit ganun noh? haha). I thank God that I had the chance to meet you, and get to be close to you, in this lifetime.

Now as you celebrate another year of your life alam ko madami kang dapat ipagpasalamat. Pero kami, mas nagpapasalamat kaming mga kaibigan, pamilya, at ibang tao pa na mapalit sayo, na makilala at makasama ka ng isang taon na naman :0 hehe Happy birthday, at happy anniv na rin. Tipid kayo sa celeb ha. Mautak talaga ang kapatid ko. Hahahaha ♥ We love you labee!









Saturday, June 2, 2012

insatiable.





I close my eyes. I continue to ponder about the things you've said. It has been a month and nothing's changed. I open my eyes and i see the pitch black sky. There's no stars tonight. I felt lonely. I keep asking myself, what went wrong? Of what I did or didn't do. I've been carrying this for quite some time now. The pain. The sadness. The hate. The anger. The loneliness. All these unanswered questions. But despite of all that, I still miss you. I still love you more than ever.

Inhaling the cigar that I just lit, it feels like I am gasping for air. I inhaled a bit longer, hoping it would numb all of what I feel.
Lying here, it feels like time has stopped.
I hope, and prayed that this night would never end.
Prayed not to see daylight again.
For it has caused me a lot of wishful thinking, a lot of hoping, that tomorrow, every thing will be alright.
But it never is.
False hope. I've had enough of that.
I've had enough of this pain.
I've had enough of pretending i'm alright.
That everything's fine.
That night, I realized,
No matter how much coffee I drink or how much cigar I consume, it will not satiate anything.
But it gave me comfort knowing that I can never run out of coffee, and cigar.

Oh that one night, it costed me. But I didn't care. For the first time in months, i felt free.