F*** Y**

OH FUCK BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY THIS.

YOU HAVE PUSHED ME TO MY LIMIT.

No more, no more disrespect. No more pain. No more anger. No more of your lame excuses. No more of you. No more of any of this.
This is the first time that I have cried in anger.
I just hope you had the balls to admit if you don't want to stick around anymore.
You're a pussy! A coward! A selfish little PRICK!!!!!!!

Mark my words

I WILL NEVER, EVER FORGET THIS DAY UNLIT I DIE.

birthday tribute to a good friend.

Hindi ko akalain na magging close ako sa isang taong nakilala ko sa malayo lamang. Akala ko dati, hndi mo makikilala ang isang tao kapag hndi pa kayo nagkita personally. Mali pala. Ngayon ko napatunayan na wala sa distansya ang pagkakaibigan.

Labee you are more than just a kuya (naks kuya daw) to us, you're a friend as well (minsan bespren pa), buddy, someone who you can run to when everything's not going well, listener, adviser, and of course, part of our family na. Isa sa pinaka magandang desisyon na ginawa ni ilay ay hayaan kang maging parte ng buhay nya, at namin, at sayo naman, parte din ng buhay at pamilya mo. Labee I could not thank you enough for all the things you've done for us, for me especially. Napaka BUTI mong tao, napaka understanding na minsan kahit sarili ko hndi ko maintindihan pero ikaw naiintindihan mo pa rin ako (bakit ganun noh? haha). I thank God that I had the chance to meet you, and get to be close to you, in this lifetime.

Now as you celebrate another year of your life alam ko madami kang dapat ipagpasalamat. Pero kami, mas nagpapasalamat kaming mga kaibigan, pamilya, at ibang tao pa na mapalit sayo, na makilala at makasama ka ng isang taon na naman :0 hehe Happy birthday, at happy anniv na rin. Tipid kayo sa celeb ha. Mautak talaga ang kapatid ko. Hahahaha ♥ We love you labee!

insatiable.

I close my eyes. I continue to ponder about the things you've said. It has been a month and nothing's changed. I open my eyes and i see the pitch black sky. There's no stars tonight. I felt lonely. I keep asking myself, what went wrong? Of what I did or didn't do. I've been carrying this for quite some time now. The pain. The sadness. The hate. The anger. The loneliness. All these unanswered questions. But despite of all that, I still miss you. I still love you more than ever.

Inhaling the cigar that I just lit, it feels like I am gasping for air. I inhaled a bit longer, hoping it would numb all of what I feel.

Lying here, it feels like time has stopped.

I hope, and prayed that this night would never end.

Prayed not to see daylight again.

For it has caused me a lot of wishful thinking, a lot of hoping, that tomorrow, every thing will be alright.

But it never is.

False hope. I've had enough of that.

I've had enough of this pain.

I've had enough of pretending i'm alright.

That everything's fine.

That night, I realized,

No matter how much coffee I drink or how much cigar I consume, it will not satiate anything.

But it gave me comfort knowing that I can never run out of coffee, and cigar.

Oh that one night, it costed me. But I didn't care. For the first time in months, i felt free.

oh this darn personality quizzes.

Your view on yourself:

You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:

You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:

You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

best of the best.

It wasn't that special when I first met you. It was a very ordinary day actually. Little did I know that it would be the thing that I would be most thankful for. The last 6 years with you were remembered by:

Camping, sleep overs, nights under the stars, gazing in awe when we see landscapes that I've shared and appreciated only with you, food trips (and lots of them!), going home late, swimming, cutting classes, eating in class, stress, depression, countless times of troubles (you know this pretty well beh), LOVE, HEARTACHES, learning, growing, with our hearts bursting with wonder, enthusiasm for life, and of course being there for each other.

And now, as we are growing older, we learn to stand up on our own two feet. Growing apart, yes, we have grown differently for the past year, and it was very hard for me, for us. But you know what beh? No matter how far apart we may be, or we may not talk for a very long time, but I am certain that what we have won't ever change :)

What we have exceeds friendship, that only we can understand. I am glad to share this with you beh. <3 Happy happy birthday beh and I love you so much!

happy birthday my soul sister <3

root of unhappiness.

The feelings that hurt most, the emotions that sting most, are those that are absurd; the longing for impossible things, precisely because they are impossible; nostalgia for what never was; the desire for what could have been; regret over not being someone else; dissatisfaction with the world’s existence. All these half-tones of the soul’s consciousness create in us a painful landscape, an eternal sunset of what we are.
– Fernando Pessoa

12.

What you see it not always what it seems.
I may look happy, but i'm dying inside.